Friday, 18 May 2012

The husband

Today I met the husband of our surrogate.  He was spending a few hours visiting with Kailash.  Again, suffering from the inability to speak Gujarati, I could only move my arms around like a fool trying to mime my message.  He was so referential.  There is a strong class and caste culture here in India and I'm sure I'm in a different class than he.  I couldn't help but wonder how he felt meeting me.  He gave me his chair and didn't really make eye contact.  I tried to thank him.  He let his wife give us this gift.  She bore my children.  She couldn't have done it without his acceptance and support.  At the same time, this is a traditional society.  I wonder how he feels about his wife being pregnant with another couple's child?  I wonder if he tells his friends Kailash is away visting family, rather than telling the truth?  I wonder if he feels inadequate that she has to do this to support the family?  So many questions, but a giant gulf between us.  

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